I Miss Who I Used to Be, but I’m Learning to Love Who I Am Now

 

                  “I Miss Who I Used to Be, but I’m Learning to Love Who I Am Now”

There are days I miss the version of me that used to dance without needing a break.

The version who could wake up early, run errands, laugh with friends, and still have energy left over.

I miss her—deeply.

And sometimes, missing her brings tears I can’t explain.

Fibromyalgia changed my life in ways I never saw coming.

Suddenly, everything became slower, softer, and at times—silent.

My body spoke a new language: pain, fatigue, fog.

It didn’t ask me. It simply took up space and stayed.

For a while, I fought it. I kept trying to be her—the old me.

But the harder I tried, the more I broke down.

Physically. Emotionally. Spiritually.

And then something happened.

Not all at once—but gently, over time.

I began to see beauty in the quiet.

In the small wins. In the way I kept showing up, even on days I felt like disappearing.

I started noticing strength not in what I could do, but in what I could endure.

In how deeply I feel. How kind I’ve become to others in pain.

How I’ve learned to pause, breathe, and listen to my body instead of punishing it.

Fibromyalgia may have taken some parts of me…

But it gave me others:

Empathy. Resilience. Gratitude for slow mornings and soft blankets.

A heart that knows how to sit beside someone in silence and say, “You’re not alone.”

I still miss the old me. And I probably always will.

But I’m learning to love who I am now—

The warrior who keeps going, even when it hurts.

The soul who cries and still chooses hope.

The woman who has learned to live gently, even in a world that pushes hard.

So to my fellow fibro fighters—if you ever miss who you used to be, I get it.

But don’t forget to look at who you are now.

You’ve come so far.

You’re still here.

And that’s something to be proud of.

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