Flare & Flourish

  Each new day brings the opportunity to grow, to heal, and to embrace the beauty of becoming. In March, winds begin to sing, A quiet song of gentle autumn. With whispers warm the winter's cold. The days stretch long, the skies grow bright. Embracing change, soft as the light. In every bloom and every leaf, March brings us hope, a sweet relief. https://x.com/FlareflourishF

                                              Understanding What We’re Dealing With When people hear “fibromyalgia,” they often assume it’s just one condition with the same symptoms for everyone. But if you’ve been living with it, you’ll know that’s far from the truth. There are actually different types of fibromyalgia, and understanding which one you have can help you manage it better. I’ve spent years trying to figure out my own symptoms, and along the way, I’ve learned that fibro isn’t one-size-fits-all. Some people struggle more with pain, while others deal with extreme fatigue, cognitive issues, or a mix of everything (lucky us, right?). 1. Hyperalgesic Fibromyalgia (Pain-Dominant) This is the type where pain takes center stage. Every touch, every movement, and sometimes even the weight of a blanket can feel unbearable. People with this type tend to experience wid...

                                                        My Late-Night Survival Guide Fibromyalgia and sleep don’t exactly go hand in hand. Some nights, no matter how exhausted I am, my body refuses to shut down. Other times, I take my prescribed sleeping pills, only to find myself lying there—wide awake, waiting for sleep that never comes. If you know, you know. So, what do I do when sleep decides to ghost me? Here’s my go-to list for surviving those endless nights: 1. Scroll (but with limits) Let’s be real—sometimes, I end up doom-scrolling. But I try to stick to things that won’t overstimulate me, like funny videos, soothing music, or catching up on messages. If you’re ever up at stupid o’clock, feel free to say hi on  Twitter/X  (or whatever they’re calling it these days). 2. Writing It Out My brain loves to overthink at night. If I ca...

How to Cope with Anxiety & PTSD While Managing Fibromyalgia I still remember the day I realised my body wasn’t just tired—it was always tired. Not the kind of tired that goes away after a nap, but the kind that settles into your bones and refuses to leave. At first, I thought it was just exhaustion, but then the pain came. And then the anxiety. Anxiety and fibromyalgia go hand in hand, like two uninvited guests who overstay their welcome. Add PTSD into the mix, and suddenly, every day feels like a battlefield—except the enemy is invisible, and no one else seems to notice the war going on inside you. I’ve always been an overthinker, but fibromyalgia turned my anxiety into something louder. The brain fog made me second-guess myself constantly. Did I already take my meds? Did I forget an important appointment? Did I just say something weird in that conversation? Simple things that shouldn’t be stressful suddenly became overwhelming. And then there’s PTSD. Triggers can be unpredictable...

  How to Advocate for Yourself in the Medical System When You Have  Fibromyalgia. Navigating the healthcare system with fibromyalgia can be frustrating, especially when doctors dismiss symptoms or fail to offer helpful treatment plans. Advocacy is essential to getting the care you deserve. Here’s how you can effectively advocate for yourself: 1. Educate Yourself on Fibromyalgia Understanding your condition empowers you to have informed discussions with healthcare professionals. Learn about: • Common symptoms (pain, fatigue, fibro fog) • Possible triggers (stress, diet, weather) • Treatment options (medications, lifestyle changes, alternative therapies) Tip: Bring research or articles from reputable sources to support your discussions with doctors. 2. Keep a Symptom & Pain Journal Doctors rely on patterns to make decisions, so tracking your symptoms is crucial. In your journal, note: • Pain levels (rate on a scale from 1-10) • Fatigue levels • What you ate (for possible die...

  My Fibromyalgia Journey: From Dismissal to Diagnosis It all started with a simple migraine and vision loss at the age of 16. At first, I didn’t think much of it, but as the symptoms persisted, I knew something wasn’t right. I went from doctor to doctor, searching for answers, only to be dismissed time and time again. My CRP levels (a marker of inflammation) were constantly high, yet the advice remained the same—“Go on a diet, exercise more.” The irony? I was already doing everything right. I exercised twice a day, ate healthily, and pushed myself beyond limits, yet my body refused to co-operate. I was labeled a “difficult puzzle” by male doctors who couldn’t seem to figure me out. Eventually, my GP decided to dig deeper, sending me for CT and MRI scans. That’s when they found two 5mm cysts in my brain. Suddenly, the relentless migraines, nosebleeds, and constant exhaustion made sense. Despite getting a full night’s sleep, I always woke up drained, as if I hadn’t slept at all. Thi...

          What Helps You When Your Pain Becomes Unbearable?   Coming from a family of alcoholics, I’ve always felt like the odd one out. They love to party, be loud, and argue over the smallest things—things I no longer have the energy for. I’ve learned that some people only pretend to listen, nodding along as if they understand, but when it comes down to it, my feelings are never valid in their eyes. In a narcissistic family, you’re always the problem, no matter how gently you express yourself. On top of that, I’m the only one in my family living with chronic illness. My immune system barely exists, and I’ve had to make peace with the fact that my struggles will never be fully understood by them. When my specialist told me to avoid painkillers because they could cause long-term damage, I trusted her. It’s been seven years without a single painkiller—seven years of enduring pain that often feels unbearable. At first, I thought there was no way I’d survive w...

Explaining the SPOON Theory to Friends & Family Living with fibromyalgia means constantly balancing energy, pain, and daily responsibilities. But explaining this to friends and family can be tough—especially when they don’t see what’s happening inside your body. That’s where The Spoon Theory comes in. What Is The Spoon Theory? Christine Miserandino, who has lupus, created The Spoon Theory to explain what it’s like to live with a chronic illness. She used spoons as a way to represent energy. A healthy person starts their day with unlimited spoons, but someone with a chronic illness like fibromyalgia only has a few. Each task—getting out of bed, showering, making food—costs a spoon. Simple things that others take for granted can quickly drain our supply. And once the spoons are gone, we have nothing left to give. Why This Matters for Fibromyalgia Fibromyalgia isn’t just about pain—it’s also about extreme fatigue, brain fog, and unpredictable flare-ups. Some days, we may look fine, bu...

Every day brings something new—a fresh start, new challenges, and unexpected obstacles. But at the end of the day, my happiness is my responsibility. It’s easy to forget that when my body and mind are screaming for rest, especially when the weight of past trauma makes everything feel unbearable. Living with a chronic illness is hard enough, but when you’ve also survived a narcissistic environment, it can feel impossible. The constant battle between pushing through and listening to your body can be exhausting. But here’s the truth: you have to put yourself first. One of the best ways to practice self-care is by allowing yourself to feel. Instead of pushing emotions aside, let them R.A.I.N.: ✨ Recognize – Acknowledge what you’re feeling without judgment. ✨ Accept – Give yourself permission to feel, no matter what the emotion is. ✨ Investigate – Gently explore where these feelings are coming from. ✨ Nurture – Show yourself kindness and care, just as you would a friend. Healing isn’t ...